Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Take Me to Your Lizard

This is an interesting article which gives insight into the open-mindedness of different types of Americans.

It came from SlashDot, which I have a link to in my sidebar...I reccomend checking it out...it's teh spiff...

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

In the Name of Science...

I found this gem on SlashDot. Interesting...no joke...

Monday, May 23, 2005

Star Wars: Revenge of the Cheese

A long delayed post, since I saw the movie on Thursday after school.

It was, in all honesty, quite good. In my opinion it was better than the last two. The plot held up and moved along smoothly, the visuals were stunning, and there were enough moments of pimpin' fight scenes.

But good lord! The cheese!

I'm lactose intolerant, and I think I started to have an allergic reaction to the movie by the end of it. I'll try not to ruin anything for those who haven't seen it, but here's what, in my opinion, is wrong with the film:

- Bad Acting
This is mostly geared toward Anakin/Darth Vader (Hayden Christiansen) and Padme (Natalie Portman). I don't know about the former, but Natalie Portman was good in Garden State. WTF happened?
They were both far too overdramatic in some points and bland in others.

- People Dying Badly
There are, undisputedly, a multitude of absolutely cool characters in Star Wars. Yet so many of these die in the most idiotic of ways. I won't ruin the movie by naming them, but they're cool, they're dead and it sucked.

- Really Slow Jedi
Jedi are raised from the wee age of four or something to be cool, calm, and impeccable fighters. But then suddenly Darth Sidous comes along and pokes two in the stomach, killing them without breaking a sweat. This makes no sense. Maybe, I could understand the first one. Maybe he was surprised. Maybe. But then he kills another in the same way, and a third with only minimal resistance. I know, Sidous is a strong fighter, leader of the Sith and whatnot, but for god's sake, any Jedi would be able to put up a decent fight. Everyone can't be a Yoda, I guess. Or even vaugly competent with a lightsaber.

- Obi-wan's Lack of Interest
(Alright, I know this looks like a spoiler, but it's not. Everyone should know by now that Anakin becomes Darth Vader. If you don't, then you're either a small kid who hasn't seen Episodes IV-VI, or a loser. If you're the former, you probably shouldn't even be on this Blogger site, and if you're the latter, I have to restrain myself from insulting you to my fullest extent)
There is a point near the end of the movie where Obi-wan witnesses Anakin doing something really evil and Darth Vader-ish. And he says "No, I can't watch any more" with no interest in his voice at all. Like it's the Home Shopping Network and they're doing light bulbs for six hours.

There is much more, but I can't remember anything I could say without spoilers.

Keep in mind that I only bag on it so much because it's Star Wars. The originals and the overall plot keep me a fan. It's just my job to point out what is terrible. The rest was delicious 100% George Lucas fun.

I also realized that Anakin is just as whiny as Luke becomes. But Anakin goes on guilt trips that lead him to a giant black suit, and Luke is too cool for that.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Which Psychological Disorder Is It Today?

Today I went to school, as per the usual...but around the end of third hour, I was struck with an extreme, violent anger that didn't seem to be caused by anything in particular...

On the walk to fourth hour, I increasingly had the urge to beat the life out of my fellow students for the slightest infractions, such as stopping suddenly or being loud...this would usually elicit only minor irritation, not homicidal urges...

This feeling abated slightly in Geometry, where I learned that I had passed my High School Proficiency Exam...woohoo...

At lunch, all was well until a friend turned off my CD player...like I said, this would normally have only made me slightly irritated, but today I wanted to seriously beat his head in. And I'm not saying that as an overstatement. I'm completly serious that I wanted to violently kill my friend with my bare hands for turning off my CD player...

This is obviously not normal behavior...

Sunday, May 15, 2005

The Answer to All Your Queries

Last night I attended my junior prom. I was accompanied by my very close freind, Josh.

I called him at about 10 am to iron out the particulars, then had to leave, declining his invitation to go swimming at his place for a few hours.

Josh asked why.

"I need to get ready", I said.

"But it's 10:30 in the morning," he said, like it was the panacea of all arguements; stating the time of day...

...But then he posed the question...THE question...

"Why does it take so long for girls to get ready?"

Well, here's the answer, as best as I can see it...keep in mind that I'm not actually much of a girl, and on a day-to-day basis, my preparation time is thirty minutes, including breakfast...

Here's what I had to do yesterday to get ready for the five hours I spent out that night...

1) Get my stuff together: dress, shoes, jewelry, etc...

2) Take a shower

3) Variable! Alright, yesterday I had the opportunity of having a spa appointment, where four people did my hair, makeup, (which I know about as much as a rock does) and had my eyebrows waxed...

Many girls do not do this, since it is generally expensive...my mom paid for it because she was out of state and she would have done most of that for me...

This took an hour...it may have taken another female as much, more, or less time, depending on the girl...

4) Change...get all the shiny fixings in the right places

5) Fix my hair so I don't look like a country singer...

6) Go to the date's house and...take...fucking...pictures...

And then leave for dinner...

There we go...that is why it took, me at least, all day to get ready...

This had better help out a few males...

Friday, May 13, 2005

Star Wars and Whatnot

Next Thursday, the last of that thirty-year epic comes to a close. I've been reading the blogs the producers have set up here, which are hilarious and make me look forward to the last movie...

But I have a revelation.

It actually could be good...the previews show some potential...

Lucas seemed to collapse in on himself when the new millenium rolled around. The last two movies were complete rubbish and made me sad. Yes, I'm a young-un; my mom wasn't even old enough to wait outside for the originals, but still...they were damn good, and my brother and I have been fans since we first saw them way back when...

So now I wanna see it...and I wanna see a good one...

Another thing is, it's rated PG13, which could have something to do with it being better than the previous two...

I've also heard rumors of a 12-minute fight scene between Anakin and Obi-wan...which might be tedious or insanely cool, depending entirely on how they do it...

In fact, the whole movie depends entirely on how they do it...The last two had potential to lose the crap...but it didn't...I'm crossing my fingers that they don't screw this one up...

I think I can forgive them many injustices if they just refrain from putting Jar-Jar-Binks in...

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Tacos: Edible Envelopes Mailing Cilantro to Your Stomach

I am rather young; nearing the end of my junior year in high school...

At the beginning of this year, I signed up for a Creative Writing class, because I like doing just that...

Mostly, we've done a large pile of nothing to do with writing.

We did children's books (I'm not too big on kids) poetry (moderately good at that, but a whole god-forsaken month is terrible) and lots of pointless projects that did nothing for me...

As the final grade of the year, however, we're starting a short story completely of our choice...no restrictions...

I want mine to have an independent film style to it...the plot is nearly impossible to pinpoint and the theme damn near invisible...

Let me back up a bit here...

I want to be some kind of a writer...in the past few years I've narrowed that vast feild down to these:

Editorialist
Novelist
Proffessor
Screenplay writer

Any of which would be great...

But it's been hard to find time to write with school...I had hoped that CW would give me an opportunity to do so, but, alas...not really...

I just might copy a few passages from my story onto here...maybe...if I'm in a good mood...